Today was convocation. I am now a BFA, an alumni, and officially an adult.

I haven’t had anytime to sit and think, let alone type anything that isn’t directly related to school work.¹

I have a small bit of a breather, that is, its 9:22 and I’m going to school for 10:30 even though I have a class at 12 so that I can get some of my stuff done in the darkroom.  The real problem here is not that I procrastinate² but Saturday class. Saturday class that eats up the majority of a day for working leaving me stranded on Sundays thinking about all the things that are due on Monday.

I keep having the strangest dreams about one of my exes. Particularly weird last night. While dream me interacted with dream him, he spent a lot of time with my one cat who died a few years ago almost as if both of them were gone.

1. I will probably do this anyway. It is My Way.↩
2. I don’t do it THAT badly↩

I’m breathing, but barely and that is how the last semester has been.

Anyway, long story really short, photos all week due Monday, book to finish, wayfinding assignments, no sleep all dark room all the time.  The nice thing is, a list has been started of people who want to buy my book. This is amazing to me since I figured no one would really give a damn about a final studio project. Proves me wrong as the list is about 7 people looking to buy and 5 as gifts.

Not to mention I’ve been getting a lot of photography feedback for people wanting to hire me and/or buy prints off of me. I should do a career switch maybe. This graphic design/illustration thing is clearly not working.  Photos are actually happening most of this week. I was lucky enough to actually get Peter to help me out since he’d be perfect for the role in mind.  He gets to kill me, but that is entirely besides the point. He felt it was a bit strange and asked me if my mind was as scary as it seems to be.

I think that answer is yes, actually. But its fun. You never get bored having my ideas running around.

Still debating moving to Toronto despite not being accepted into grad school. Not sure yet. I’d need a place to live and while it would be really easy to just move in with a friend the cats are probably not compatible. The plus side of that being that we’d never see each other. The benefits of living with a person without the hassle of ever having to see them. I am so anti-social apparently.  So I’m looking for any types of media jobs that are relevant to my interests. Graphic design, illustration, photography….anything really. Except web design. I’d prefer not to make a career of it.  I’m looking at Edmonton too.  I think that it is just time to get out of Calgary.

The grad school thing really threw a wrench into my plans. I’m not sure what to do now, but at least the rejection letter was nice. I keep getting this feeling though, that with the amount of times I’ve received some kind of rejection in the last few months that I would be use to it. By far the biggest blow though, mostly because my art is my life and it still feels like they though I wasn’t good enough.

Interestingly enough, this image was enough to get people to want to buy the book. Why can’t it be that easy to get a job?